poem after a student at my university got on the mic at graduation and said trans people didn’t exist & poem as instructions for survival
nat raum
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poem after a student at my university got on the mic at graduation and said trans people didn’t exist
An American sonnet
now everyone go around the circle and say your name,
your pronouns, and a fun fact about yourself. well, i’m nat,
my pronouns are out of order, and a fun fact about me is
that i’m the only trans person in this room. all of you will
misgender me more than you get it right and honestly, that’s fine
with me even though i know some of you aren’t even trying.
and let’s not talk about what happens when i venture outside
the bubble of people it’s theoretically safe to be trans around—
you’ll catch me succumbing to every she/her for my own
survival, grateful for once that my body still looks like camouflage
and especially so after a graduate yanks the microphone,
blasts a rented music hall with her transphobia. here’s a fun
fact for you: universities don’t make statements when trans
rights are under attack on campus—i know this from experience.
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poem as instructions for survival
keep a baseball bat in the back of your car. clip a knife that’s bigger than it needs to be to your work lanyard. tuck a field hockey stick under your side of the bed.1 bind your chest just enough so that you don’t look feminine, but don’t tip the scales so far that you don’t pass.2 don’t correct people when they misgender you. don’t flinch when they’re casually transphobic or cissexist.3 don’t think of meghan riley lewis when people point their fingers at red states.4 when all of this inevitably fails, lose your marbles. cross out he/she on that form you have to sign and write they.5 refuse to conform to sanitized image of a trans person with all their angles pulled taut, no room for slack.6 push the outlines; color all over the page. when someone implies you are wrong for it, ask who taught them what is right.7 ignore everyone who minds. embrace everyone who still matters.
1 this is in case anyone tries to fuck with you.
2 this is so everyone respects you to your face.
3 this is to preserve your energy for the people that deserve it.
4 this is because she was shot so close to where you were born but no one here thinks they’re the problem.
5 this is called taking up space.
6 this is inspired by your friend bazil, who once wrote why must i be on my knees for you to feel comfortable?
7 this is just common sense.
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nat raum is a queer disabled artist and writer based on unceded Piscataway and Susquehannock land in Baltimore. They’re the editor-in-chief of fifth wheel press and the author of fruits of the valley, this book will not save you, random access memory, and others. Find them online at natraum.com.
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