Free Pie
Eli S. Evans
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The red painted sign staked into the grass beside the stoplight just off the highway exit said “PIE SALE,” and the rich man followed it in the direction indicated until he came upon a long table stacked with pies set up in front of a modest little slab ranch. Behind it, a woman wearing a house dress sat holding a small metal cash box.
“I’d like to buy a pie,” the rich man said, approaching the table, “but I don’t have any money.”
“Sorry,” said the woman. “No free pie.”
“Funny,” replied the rich man. “That’s the same thing your mom said to me last night when I picked her up under the Ninth Street bridge.”
“My mother’s dead, you pig!” gasped the woman and clobbered the man right in the face with a pie.
“Yum, yum,” he said. “Free pie.”
And now we know how he got so rich.
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Eli S. Evans publishes his absurdist bits and bobs all about the internet. In addition, two books of small stories, Obscure & Irregular and Various Stories About Specific Individuals in Particular Situations, have been published by Moon Rabbit Books & Ephemera. Buy one!
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Posted in Fall Feasts: Nov' 24 and tagged in #boudin, #fiction, #flashfiction, #microfiction, Fiction