{"id":22013,"date":"2026-04-22T13:48:01","date_gmt":"2026-04-22T18:48:01","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.mcneese.edu\/thereview\/?p=22013"},"modified":"2026-04-25T21:00:32","modified_gmt":"2026-04-26T02:00:32","slug":"kansas-anyway","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.mcneese.edu\/thereview\/kansas-anyway\/","title":{"rendered":"Kansas, anyway"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<ul class=\"wp-block-social-links is-content-justification-right is-layout-flex wp-container-core-social-links-is-layout-765c4724 wp-block-social-links-is-layout-flex\"><li class=\"wp-social-link wp-social-link-facebook  wp-block-social-link\"><a href=\"https:\/\/www.facebook.com\/profile.php?id=61556140010887\" class=\"wp-block-social-link-anchor\"><svg width=\"24\" height=\"24\" viewBox=\"0 0 24 24\" version=\"1.1\" xmlns=\"http:\/\/www.w3.org\/2000\/svg\" aria-hidden=\"true\" focusable=\"false\"><path d=\"M12 2C6.5 2 2 6.5 2 12c0 5 3.7 9.1 8.4 9.9v-7H7.9V12h2.5V9.8c0-2.5 1.5-3.9 3.8-3.9 1.1 0 2.2.2 2.2.2v2.5h-1.3c-1.2 0-1.6.8-1.6 1.6V12h2.8l-.4 2.9h-2.3v7C18.3 21.1 22 17 22 12c0-5.5-4.5-10-10-10z\"><\/path><\/svg><span class=\"wp-block-social-link-label screen-reader-text\">Facebook<\/span><\/a><\/li>\n\n<li class=\"wp-social-link wp-social-link-instagram  wp-block-social-link\"><a href=\"https:\/\/www.instagram.com\/boudin_mcneese\/\" class=\"wp-block-social-link-anchor\"><svg width=\"24\" height=\"24\" viewBox=\"0 0 24 24\" version=\"1.1\" xmlns=\"http:\/\/www.w3.org\/2000\/svg\" aria-hidden=\"true\" focusable=\"false\"><path d=\"M12,4.622c2.403,0,2.688,0.009,3.637,0.052c0.877,0.04,1.354,0.187,1.671,0.31c0.42,0.163,0.72,0.358,1.035,0.673 c0.315,0.315,0.51,0.615,0.673,1.035c0.123,0.317,0.27,0.794,0.31,1.671c0.043,0.949,0.052,1.234,0.052,3.637 s-0.009,2.688-0.052,3.637c-0.04,0.877-0.187,1.354-0.31,1.671c-0.163,0.42-0.358,0.72-0.673,1.035 c-0.315,0.315-0.615,0.51-1.035,0.673c-0.317,0.123-0.794,0.27-1.671,0.31c-0.949,0.043-1.233,0.052-3.637,0.052 s-2.688-0.009-3.637-0.052c-0.877-0.04-1.354-0.187-1.671-0.31c-0.42-0.163-0.72-0.358-1.035-0.673 c-0.315-0.315-0.51-0.615-0.673-1.035c-0.123-0.317-0.27-0.794-0.31-1.671C4.631,14.688,4.622,14.403,4.622,12 s0.009-2.688,0.052-3.637c0.04-0.877,0.187-1.354,0.31-1.671c0.163-0.42,0.358-0.72,0.673-1.035 c0.315-0.315,0.615-0.51,1.035-0.673c0.317-0.123,0.794-0.27,1.671-0.31C9.312,4.631,9.597,4.622,12,4.622 M12,3 C9.556,3,9.249,3.01,8.289,3.054C7.331,3.098,6.677,3.25,6.105,3.472C5.513,3.702,5.011,4.01,4.511,4.511 c-0.5,0.5-0.808,1.002-1.038,1.594C3.25,6.677,3.098,7.331,3.054,8.289C3.01,9.249,3,9.556,3,12c0,2.444,0.01,2.751,0.054,3.711 c0.044,0.958,0.196,1.612,0.418,2.185c0.23,0.592,0.538,1.094,1.038,1.594c0.5,0.5,1.002,0.808,1.594,1.038 c0.572,0.222,1.227,0.375,2.185,0.418C9.249,20.99,9.556,21,12,21s2.751-0.01,3.711-0.054c0.958-0.044,1.612-0.196,2.185-0.418 c0.592-0.23,1.094-0.538,1.594-1.038c0.5-0.5,0.808-1.002,1.038-1.594c0.222-0.572,0.375-1.227,0.418-2.185 C20.99,14.751,21,14.444,21,12s-0.01-2.751-0.054-3.711c-0.044-0.958-0.196-1.612-0.418-2.185c-0.23-0.592-0.538-1.094-1.038-1.594 c-0.5-0.5-1.002-0.808-1.594-1.038c-0.572-0.222-1.227-0.375-2.185-0.418C14.751,3.01,14.444,3,12,3L12,3z M12,7.378 c-2.552,0-4.622,2.069-4.622,4.622S9.448,16.622,12,16.622s4.622-2.069,4.622-4.622S14.552,7.378,12,7.378z M12,15 c-1.657,0-3-1.343-3-3s1.343-3,3-3s3,1.343,3,3S13.657,15,12,15z M16.804,6.116c-0.596,0-1.08,0.484-1.08,1.08 s0.484,1.08,1.08,1.08c0.596,0,1.08-0.484,1.08-1.08S17.401,6.116,16.804,6.116z\"><\/path><\/svg><span class=\"wp-block-social-link-label screen-reader-text\">Instagram<\/span><\/a><\/li><\/ul>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-large-font-size\"><strong>Kansas, anyway<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-medium-font-size\"><strong>Rachele Salvini<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-medium-font-size\">__________<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-medium-font-size\">Since I moved here, I\u2019ve been looking up horrible Kansas stories to avoid thinking. I read about a mother who never let her kid out, so he grew up in his room, never able to meet other children. He sat in his own feces, crawling like a monkey. The cops who found him had to step out to vomit.&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-medium-font-size\">I know it\u2019s crazy and selfish, but these stories reassure me, somehow. They remind me that I need to stop feeling like shit, because, I mean, look at what happens to other people. Comparatively, I am okay \u2014 I left, and here I am, surrounded by these wide expanses of nothingness, where you could never find me.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-medium-font-size\">Still, the story about the dog of that guy who got murdered in Kansas made me think of you.&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-medium-font-size\">It\u2019s a true story: look it up. Although I guess you can\u2019t look it up now \u2014 which you never liked doing anyway \u2014, because I moved to Kansas, and I can\u2019t really tell you to look things up anymore. Which I suppose is a good thing. I don\u2019t want to be able to tell you to look things up.&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-medium-font-size\">Although, even when I used to tell you about something, and you rolled your eyes, saying, \u201cI don\u2019t think that\u2019s right,\u201d and then I told you to look it up then, you never believed me anyway.&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-medium-font-size\">I noticed that, when I think of you, I think a lot of \u201canyways.\u201d&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-medium-font-size\">Like how you never liked how I dressed anyway. \u201cYou\u2019re ridiculous,\u201d you said that time I got a pair of sparkly boots from the thrift store.&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-medium-font-size\">Or how you never liked my music taste anyway. \u201cThis is gay shit,\u201d you said, when I danced to David Bowie\u2019s \u201cModern Love.\u201d&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-medium-font-size\">Or how you never liked what I did for work anyway. \u201cWriting doesn\u2019t really matter,\u201d you said, drunk as most nights, lying on the floor of my apartment.&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-medium-font-size\">When you inevitably passed out, I always took the time to drag you to bed, all 6\u20195\u2019\u2019 of you. I had to stop and rest even across the twenty feet to my bedroom, and let your wrists fall back onto the floor.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-medium-font-size\">Sometimes I wonder what would have happened if I hadn\u2019t dragged you at all, and I\u2019d left you there, walked off, tucked myself in, and let you choke on your vomit or wake up in the early hour of the day on the cold tile floor without a blanket or my warm body asleep beside you, always ready to get up and fetch you a bucket if you were sick.&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-medium-font-size\">You\u2019re probably still drunk on someone\u2019s floor anyway. You were good that way at first: I remember how you picked flowers for me on the side of the road.&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-medium-font-size\">I\u2019m sure some other girl is cleaning up your vomit now.&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-medium-font-size\">Or maybe not. Maybe that\u2019s why you were drunk all the time \u2014 because of all those \u201canyways.\u201d You didn\u2019t really like who I was, and maybe you\u2019ve found someone that doesn\u2019t have to drag you, because you walk to bed with her and hug her tiny frame under the covers. She listens to country like you, wears oversized hoodies like you, does a blue-collar job like you.&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-medium-font-size\">These thoughts confuse me, and that\u2019s when I look up gruesome stories: cases of people who experienced things far worse than mine \u2014 even though everyone keeps telling me that what you did to me was bad, that I was lucky to get out, that Kansas is giving me a new chance.&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-medium-font-size\">I know they\u2019re right.&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-medium-font-size\">I still wonder if another girl has to drag you to bed.&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-medium-font-size\">As for my bed, well, it\u2019s dry and empty now, a wide expanse of nothingness. Kinda like Kansas.&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-medium-font-size\">Anyway, as usual, I lost my train of thought: a guy got murdered in Kansas. No one knew who did it, and they couldn\u2019t find his dog. To avoid thinking, I try to imagine what kind of dog it was \u2014 surely not a pitbull or a rottweiler; maybe a lab, or one of those curly Retriever-Poodle mixes. A few days later, the dog was put up for adoption at a shelter in California, and someone identified him.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-medium-font-size\">To distract myself from remembering all the times I dragged you to bed \u2014 which inevitably leads to remembering the times you got drunk and angry, yelling and throwing things, pushing and shaking me, and then, eventually, hitting me, I wonder how a dog from Kansas could end up in California: did the murderer steal him and then realize it was too much of a hassle, and it could get him caught? Did he abandon him, or actually took him to the shelter in an unexpected act of kindness?&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-medium-font-size\">I looked everywhere and couldn\u2019t find out.&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-medium-font-size\">I know none of this matters anyway.&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-medium-font-size\">Anyway, Kansas. I\u2019m here now, lying in the quiet prairie of my bed. I\u2019m not in the mood to dance to \u201cModern Love\u201d anymore, but I still have countless playlists full of songs you\u2019d probably call \u201cgay shit.\u201d I even stumbled onto a song by Gorillaz called \u201cKansas,\u201d which is all about a guy who has to move on. \u201cI\u2019m not gonna cry,\u201d he says, \u201cI\u2019ll find another dream.\u201d&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-medium-font-size\">The prairie is empty and quiet, but it feels limitless. So many things can happen in such a vast space.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-medium-font-size\">I still think about that dog, suddenly finding himself in California after watching his owner get murdered, ending up in a shelter to start a new life.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-medium-font-size\">How do we end up where we do? How did I end up dragging you across my floor, feeling ridiculous in sparkly boots, turning down David Bowie, believing that maybe writing didn\u2019t matter at all, like you said? How did I end up in Kansas, so far away from you, trying to hope you would never find me again?&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-medium-font-size\">I don\u2019t know. But don\u2019t look me up this time.&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-medium-font-size\">I am somewhere on the vast prairie, writing all this anyway.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-medium-font-size\">__________<\/p>\n\n\n\n<figure class=\"wp-block-image size-full\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" width=\"503\" height=\"500\" src=\"https:\/\/www.mcneese.edu\/thereview\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/37\/2026\/04\/Guinness-e1777062525279.png\" alt=\"\" class=\"wp-image-22145\" \/><\/figure>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-medium-font-size\"><strong>Rachele Salvini&#8217;s<\/strong> two greatest loves: her cat, Guinness, and Nutella.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-medium-font-size\">__________<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-medium-font-size\"><strong>Rachele Salvini<\/strong> is an Italian woman based in the US. She spent most of her life in Italy, and she writes both in English and Italian. Her chapbook, <em>Oklahoma Bestiary<\/em>, was the runner-up for the 2023 <em>Quarterly West<\/em> Chapbook Award and came out in early 2025. Her work in English has been published in <em>Prairie Schooner<\/em>, <em>Moon City Review<\/em>, and others. She currently lives in Kansas, where she&#8217;s the Director of Writing at Ottawa University, and she earned her PhD in Creative Writing at Oklahoma State University.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><strong>__________<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n<div class=\"wp-block-image\">\n<figure class=\"alignleft size-full\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" width=\"438\" height=\"211\" src=\"https:\/\/www.mcneese.edu\/thereview\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/37\/2024\/01\/boudin-logo-1.jpg\" alt=\"\" class=\"wp-image-15484\" srcset=\"https:\/\/www.mcneese.edu\/thereview\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/37\/2024\/01\/boudin-logo-1.jpg 438w, https:\/\/www.mcneese.edu\/thereview\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/37\/2024\/01\/boudin-logo-1-300x145.jpg 300w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 438px) 100vw, 438px\" \/><\/figure>\n<\/div>\n\n\n<p class=\"has-text-align-center has-large-font-size\">&lt;&lt; <a href=\"https:\/\/www.mcneese.edu\/thereview\/ancestor-mother-goddess\/\">Back<\/a> <a href=\"https:\/\/www.mcneese.edu\/thereview\/familiar-studies-of-the-queen\/\">Next<\/a> &gt;&gt;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-medium-font-size\">To learn more about submitting your work to <em><a href=\"https:\/\/www.mcneese.edu\/thereview\/boudin-submissions\/\">Boudin<\/a><\/em> or applying to McNeese State University&#8217;s Creative Writing <a href=\"https:\/\/www.mcneese.edu\/thereview\/mfa-application-submissions\/\">MFA program<\/a>, please visit Submissions for details.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Kansas, anyway Rachele Salvini __________ Since I moved here, I\u2019ve been looking up horrible Kansas stories to avoid thinking. I read about a mother who never let her kid out, so he grew up in his room, never able to meet other children. He sat in his own feces, crawling like a monkey. The cops&hellip;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":98,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[251],"tags":[75,173,247,116],"class_list":["post-22013","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-third-annual-pet-writing-contest","tag-boudin","tag-cnf-2","tag-creative-nonfiction-2","tag-nonfiction"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.mcneese.edu\/thereview\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/22013","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.mcneese.edu\/thereview\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.mcneese.edu\/thereview\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.mcneese.edu\/thereview\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/98"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.mcneese.edu\/thereview\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=22013"}],"version-history":[{"count":4,"href":"https:\/\/www.mcneese.edu\/thereview\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/22013\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":22162,"href":"https:\/\/www.mcneese.edu\/thereview\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/22013\/revisions\/22162"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.mcneese.edu\/thereview\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=22013"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.mcneese.edu\/thereview\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=22013"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.mcneese.edu\/thereview\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=22013"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}