{"id":17467,"date":"2024-09-23T13:21:48","date_gmt":"2024-09-23T18:21:48","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.mcneese.edu\/thereview\/?p=17467"},"modified":"2024-09-30T10:39:05","modified_gmt":"2024-09-30T15:39:05","slug":"delsantos-beach","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.mcneese.edu\/thereview\/2024\/09\/23\/delsantos-beach\/","title":{"rendered":"DelSanto&#8217;s Beach"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<p class=\"has-large-font-size\"><strong>DelSanto&#8217;s Beach<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n<ul class=\"wp-block-social-links is-content-justification-right is-layout-flex wp-container-core-social-links-is-layout-765c4724 wp-block-social-links-is-layout-flex\"><li class=\"wp-social-link wp-social-link-facebook  wp-block-social-link\"><a href=\"https:\/\/www.facebook.com\/profile.php?id=61556140010887\" class=\"wp-block-social-link-anchor\"><svg width=\"24\" height=\"24\" viewBox=\"0 0 24 24\" version=\"1.1\" xmlns=\"http:\/\/www.w3.org\/2000\/svg\" aria-hidden=\"true\" focusable=\"false\"><path d=\"M12 2C6.5 2 2 6.5 2 12c0 5 3.7 9.1 8.4 9.9v-7H7.9V12h2.5V9.8c0-2.5 1.5-3.9 3.8-3.9 1.1 0 2.2.2 2.2.2v2.5h-1.3c-1.2 0-1.6.8-1.6 1.6V12h2.8l-.4 2.9h-2.3v7C18.3 21.1 22 17 22 12c0-5.5-4.5-10-10-10z\"><\/path><\/svg><span class=\"wp-block-social-link-label screen-reader-text\">Facebook<\/span><\/a><\/li>\n\n<li class=\"wp-social-link wp-social-link-instagram  wp-block-social-link\"><a href=\"https:\/\/www.instagram.com\/boudin_mcneese\/\" class=\"wp-block-social-link-anchor\"><svg width=\"24\" height=\"24\" viewBox=\"0 0 24 24\" version=\"1.1\" xmlns=\"http:\/\/www.w3.org\/2000\/svg\" aria-hidden=\"true\" focusable=\"false\"><path d=\"M12,4.622c2.403,0,2.688,0.009,3.637,0.052c0.877,0.04,1.354,0.187,1.671,0.31c0.42,0.163,0.72,0.358,1.035,0.673 c0.315,0.315,0.51,0.615,0.673,1.035c0.123,0.317,0.27,0.794,0.31,1.671c0.043,0.949,0.052,1.234,0.052,3.637 s-0.009,2.688-0.052,3.637c-0.04,0.877-0.187,1.354-0.31,1.671c-0.163,0.42-0.358,0.72-0.673,1.035 c-0.315,0.315-0.615,0.51-1.035,0.673c-0.317,0.123-0.794,0.27-1.671,0.31c-0.949,0.043-1.233,0.052-3.637,0.052 s-2.688-0.009-3.637-0.052c-0.877-0.04-1.354-0.187-1.671-0.31c-0.42-0.163-0.72-0.358-1.035-0.673 c-0.315-0.315-0.51-0.615-0.673-1.035c-0.123-0.317-0.27-0.794-0.31-1.671C4.631,14.688,4.622,14.403,4.622,12 s0.009-2.688,0.052-3.637c0.04-0.877,0.187-1.354,0.31-1.671c0.163-0.42,0.358-0.72,0.673-1.035 c0.315-0.315,0.615-0.51,1.035-0.673c0.317-0.123,0.794-0.27,1.671-0.31C9.312,4.631,9.597,4.622,12,4.622 M12,3 C9.556,3,9.249,3.01,8.289,3.054C7.331,3.098,6.677,3.25,6.105,3.472C5.513,3.702,5.011,4.01,4.511,4.511 c-0.5,0.5-0.808,1.002-1.038,1.594C3.25,6.677,3.098,7.331,3.054,8.289C3.01,9.249,3,9.556,3,12c0,2.444,0.01,2.751,0.054,3.711 c0.044,0.958,0.196,1.612,0.418,2.185c0.23,0.592,0.538,1.094,1.038,1.594c0.5,0.5,1.002,0.808,1.594,1.038 c0.572,0.222,1.227,0.375,2.185,0.418C9.249,20.99,9.556,21,12,21s2.751-0.01,3.711-0.054c0.958-0.044,1.612-0.196,2.185-0.418 c0.592-0.23,1.094-0.538,1.594-1.038c0.5-0.5,0.808-1.002,1.038-1.594c0.222-0.572,0.375-1.227,0.418-2.185 C20.99,14.751,21,14.444,21,12s-0.01-2.751-0.054-3.711c-0.044-0.958-0.196-1.612-0.418-2.185c-0.23-0.592-0.538-1.094-1.038-1.594 c-0.5-0.5-1.002-0.808-1.594-1.038c-0.572-0.222-1.227-0.375-2.185-0.418C14.751,3.01,14.444,3,12,3L12,3z M12,7.378 c-2.552,0-4.622,2.069-4.622,4.622S9.448,16.622,12,16.622s4.622-2.069,4.622-4.622S14.552,7.378,12,7.378z M12,15 c-1.657,0-3-1.343-3-3s1.343-3,3-3s3,1.343,3,3S13.657,15,12,15z M16.804,6.116c-0.596,0-1.08,0.484-1.08,1.08 s0.484,1.08,1.08,1.08c0.596,0,1.08-0.484,1.08-1.08S17.401,6.116,16.804,6.116z\"><\/path><\/svg><span class=\"wp-block-social-link-label screen-reader-text\">Instagram<\/span><\/a><\/li><\/ul>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-medium-font-size\"><strong>Joe Kapitan<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-medium-font-size\">__________<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-medium-font-size\">Remy, the foreman in Weighing\/Sorting, says I should never have been hired in the first place (Human Resources needs to start giving attitude tests, not aptitude tests, he says). Feldman has taken to sitting at another lunch table, the same Feldman who used to ask me daily if I was going to eat that fruit I\u2019d packed, as if my brown paper sack was full of charitable donations. Truth be told, I am fine with viewing Feldman from across the dingy cafeteria, sitting with his new friends from Shipping, the taut, shiny skin of his swollen face looking like an overripe melon. Most of my other co-workers in Receiving are just drifting away, an inch at a time&#8212;fewer comments at the water cooler, less invitations for after-work beers. If asked, they would deny it, of course, and if pressed, they\u2019d just blame me: why do you have to do this, with the persistent questions and the endless wondering? Most would, but not all. There\u2019s DelSanto, the new hire in Quality Control. She has hair as black as a raven\u2019s shadow, the kind that belongs on an actress in a famous foreign film that I should have seen before yet somehow never have. Her eyes are sea-green; not in a visual way, but in an aural way&#8212;they sound like waves washing across the smooth white beach that is the inner surface of my skull. Of the tens of thousands of looks exchanged daily between the two hundred employees of the Apex depot, she owns one precious crooked smile that\u2019s reserved for me and me alone, the way one questioner can recognize another, without words.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-text-align-center has-medium-font-size\">*<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-medium-font-size\">I\u2019m called off the dock Friday afternoon, right in middle of a big offload, a trailer packed to the rafters with little packages, and The Boss tells me to report to Human Resources. I say, how about as soon as I get this semi emptied? Boss says no, Reeves, now. Feldman stops his tow-motor and shoots me a look that says: bye-bye, fella.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-medium-font-size\">The greetings assistant, Ms. Gupta, escorts me from the outer HR office to the inner one, where Ms. Simmons asks me to take a seat on the orange plastic chairs and fill out a request form. \u201cBut I\u2019m not requesting this,\u201d I say. \u201cYou must,\u201d answers Ms. Simmons. \u201cThe Vice President of Human Resources can\u2019t meet with a worker unless the worker requests it.\u201d \u201cAh, procedure,\u201d I say. \u201cYes, exactly,\u201d she responds.&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-medium-font-size\">Procedure. I\u2019ve worked at Apex Redistribution for eighteen months, which is seventeen months longer than needed to understand that \u201cprocedure\u201d means the mutually-agreed-upon consumption of tasteless, formless, meaningless bullshit.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-medium-font-size\">After ten minutes, Ms. Simmons says I can see Ms. Lafferty now.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-medium-font-size\">Ms. Lafferty is tall and blonde, but not the kind you\u2019re picturing. She\u2019s big-boned, and her hair is cut short against her head, like Charlize Theron in <em>The Astronaut\u2019s Wife<\/em>. She\u2019s attractive, but only in the way that would have you asking her permission first before you even ventured the thought. I\u2019ve seen Lafferty on Sunday mornings; she goes to the same church we do, my wife Ellie and I, but only my wife knows her. They\u2019re both in the Holy Book Postulate Group.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-medium-font-size\">Ms. Lafferty takes a breath and dives right in.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-medium-font-size\">\u201cSo, you wanted to see me, Mr. Reeves?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-medium-font-size\">\u201cNo ma\u2019am, the boss told me to come here. Please, call me Norman.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-medium-font-size\">\u201cIt wasn\u2019t your choice?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-medium-font-size\">\u201cNo, ma\u2019am.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-medium-font-size\">\u201cBut that\u2019s not what you wrote here on your request form, Mr. Reeves.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-medium-font-size\">\u201cI know, but Ms. Simmons said\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-medium-font-size\">\u201cSo, you lied on your request form?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-medium-font-size\">\u201cNo. I mean, sort of. Yes. I\u2019m just doing what I\u2019m told.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-medium-font-size\">\u201cI see. Well, now that you\u2019re here, Mr. Reeves, can I ask you about the questions?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-medium-font-size\">\u201cOn the request form?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-medium-font-size\">\u201cNo, the ones you\u2019ve been asking around the plant, for weeks now. Questions about Apex.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-medium-font-size\">\u201cI\u2019m sorry, Ms. Lafferty, but is that against procedure, asking questions? I meant no harm by it. It\u2019s just that I have an inquisitive mind.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-medium-font-size\">\u201cWe\u2019d prefer you have an industrious mind. For instance, why do you need to know what\u2019s in the packages?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-medium-font-size\">\u201cWell, I handle them all day, every day, so I guess I got to wondering what\u2019s inside them&#8212;the big ones and the little ones.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-medium-font-size\">\u201cMr. Reeves, do we pay you to wonder, or to unload?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-medium-font-size\">(She has a point. And more on the way, I\u2019ll wager.)<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-medium-font-size\">\u201cMr. Reeves, our customers rely on Apex to deliver (on time) the precise combinations of packages they require. Your group, Receiving, unloads the shipments of big and little packages. Quality Control makes sure the big ones are big enough, yet not overly big, and the same for the little ones. From there, Weighing\/Sorting pulls together the orders our clients require, and Shipping delivers them in a timely fashion. What\u2019s so hard to understand?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-medium-font-size\">(This is where I just should stand up and walk out. This is where acting un-Reeves-ish would be preferable, but no).<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-medium-font-size\">\u201cMs. Lafferty, doesn\u2019t it seem like our customers could just order big ones and little ones themselves, directly from the manufacturers, and assemble their own orders?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-medium-font-size\">Lafferty clenches her jaw so hard that a blue vein erupts on her temple. She stands and walks to her office door, closing it gently before she commences shouting.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-medium-font-size\">\u201cAre you trying to put us out of business? Why do you even work in the redistribution industry if you entertain blasphemous thoughts like this? Has anyone else heard you spewing this garbage?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-medium-font-size\">She sits down and attacks the keyboard on her desk, typing words into some file. \u201cYou\u2019re on probation, Reeves. If you can avoid screwing up again during the next thirty days, you just might save your job.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-medium-font-size\">The blue vein in her temple is still throbbing, and now I\u2019m not sure how I thought she resembled Charlize Theron.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-medium-font-size\">I report back to the dock. I have just enough time to finish the unload before the quitting-time bell. I hurry to the locker room to grab my coat, hoping no one is looking too hard at my waistline. The little packages are little, but are they little enough to be inconspicuous?<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-text-align-center has-medium-font-size\">*<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-medium-font-size\">A few years ago, I watched a late-night talk-show interview with Charlize Theron. The host asked Charlize why she\u2019d never married. Her answer was simple: no one has ever made me not want to be single.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-text-align-center has-medium-font-size\">*<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-medium-font-size\">At home, Ellie is in the kitchen, staring at me, and I\u2019m staring at the little package sitting on our granite countertop. It\u2019s roughly cubic, four inches all around, and sealed in a gray plastic wrapper just like the gray, plastic look on Ellie\u2019s face.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-medium-font-size\">\u201cGreat, now you\u2019re stealing packages from work. Are you trying to get fired, Norm?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-medium-font-size\">\u201cOf course not, El. I just want to see what\u2019s inside. Then I\u2019ll re-wrap it carefully and bring it back Monday morning. The new girl, DelSanto, told me that she won\u2019t be inspecting the fresh load of littles until first break, and there\u2019s no overtime this weekend. Plenty of time for her to slip it back into the pile. She\u2019s in on this with me. No worries.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-medium-font-size\">Ellie\u2019s look is sharper now, hotter, as if the mere mention of DelSanto\u2019s name is accompanied by the whiff of another woman\u2019s perfume. She approaches me like she\u2019s charging up for a slap, but her arm darts to the countertop and snatches away the little package. She hides it behind the small of her back. \u201cI\u2019ll give it back to you when you leave for work Monday,\u201d she says. \u201cAnd don\u2019t ever mention that woman\u2019s name in this house again,\u201d she adds, a blue vein appearing like punctuation.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-text-align-center has-medium-font-size\">*<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-medium-font-size\">Saturday night, I have this dream: I\u2019m walking on a beach, and ahead in the distance lies a dark shape on the sand. Seagulls dance around it\u2014rising into the air, settling again. As I approach, I see the shape is ragged and gray and I hope it\u2019s not a body. It\u2019s not. It\u2019s a package from work; one of the bigs, torn open along one side, its contents spilled across the sand. The big package is full of little ones, some already starting to float away. Among the littles rests the body of a dead gull. The waves tug at it gently, then push it back again, as if the sea has never seen such a thing.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-text-align-center has-medium-font-size\">*<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-medium-font-size\">On Sunday morning, Lafferty and I pretend not to see each other across the center aisle, but I notice that she must have gotten her hair done again yesterday because it\u2019s even shorter now, like Charlize Theron as Furiosa in <em>Mad Max: Fury Road<\/em>. Lafferty sits on the right side, near the band, and Ellie and I usually sit on the left side, near the light control console. The church itself is a cross between a cathedral and a theater; up front, resting on the altar\/stage, is the Holy Book in all its hermetically sealed mystery. The preacher delivers a fresh take on what he surmises The Book says about free will; that we should act the way we\u2019re supposed to act because the almighty one, the hidden one, who is infinitely smarter than we are, has already laid out for us the freest path possible, and all we need to do is adhere to that path. This is followed by some amens, some songs, the passing of the basket, and then coffee\/donut time. During coffee time, Ellie and Lafferty and some others march off to a conference room to further speculate on what The Holy Book might say. They walk together, chatting, and my coffee is cold, and I do not think the two are unrelated.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-text-align-center has-medium-font-size\">*<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-medium-font-size\">Monday morning comes, and I\u2019m at the depot early so I\u2019m sure to meet up with DelSanto by the employee entrance. I slip the little package into the pocket of her coat. She answers with the eyes and the smile, and they both bring the wave\u2019s gentle crash between my ears, and this time, I swear, the cry of a seagull.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-medium-font-size\">It takes me most of the day to unload one trailer of bigs, and a second one of littles, and it\u2019s a half hour before quitting time when I\u2019m called to Lafferty\u2019s office again. Gupta passes me right to Simmons, who doesn\u2019t need a form this time. I\u2019m shown right into Lafferty\u2019s office.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-medium-font-size\">\u201cHello, Norman,\u201d she says, our cleaned-up Furiosa.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-medium-font-size\">\u201cHi,\u201d I say, waiting for it.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-medium-font-size\">\u201cYou know, I like your wife a lot. I look forward to talking with her on Sunday mornings. We agree on many things. For instance, we agree that you want to do what\u2019s right, but you\u2019re readily tempted. If temptations are removed from your life, it will be easier for you to stay on the path. Ellie wants you to keep your job, and so do we. We\u2019re willing to help you. Norman. Will you accept our help?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-medium-font-size\">I swallow hard. \u201cI never opened the package,\u201d I say.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-medium-font-size\">\u201cI know you didn\u2019t. That\u2019s how I know there\u2019s hope for you. But don\u2019t do it again. Stop wondering, stop questioning. As The Book most likely says, trust what\u2019s been laid out in front of you. I hope I don\u2019t need to see you in here again.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-medium-font-size\">I leave HR and head straight for the locker room. I know before I get there that DelSanto\u2019s lock is gone, her locker empty. Feldman stands nearby, sneering, a variation of his bye-bye-fella look, and I wish that just once I could ram my fist straight through the rind of his overripe melon.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-medium-font-size\">I drive home in silence, the kind that\u2019s only created by a fresh bloom of questions. By the time I reach my driveway, they\u2019ve all coalesced into one: if Ellie and Lafferty and The Book and the depot hold the path that\u2019s best for me, then there shouldn\u2019t be so many questions, right? There should be more waves than wonderings. There should be more seagulls.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-medium-font-size\">__________<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-medium-font-size\"><strong>Joe Kapitan<\/strong> (he\/him) writes fiction and creative nonfiction in Cleveland. He is the author of a chapbook, a short story collection, and over eighty individual pieces published online or in print,\u00a0including an editor&#8217;s highlighted selection in <em>Best Small Fictions 2023<\/em>. Joe serves on the <em>Pithead Chapel<\/em> staff as an assistant CNF editor, and recently presented at Literary\u00a0Cleveland&#8217;s 2024 Inkubator Writing Conference.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><strong>__________<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n<div class=\"wp-block-image\">\n<figure class=\"alignleft size-full\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" width=\"438\" height=\"211\" src=\"https:\/\/www.mcneese.edu\/thereview\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/37\/2024\/01\/boudin-logo-1.jpg\" alt=\"\" class=\"wp-image-15484\" srcset=\"https:\/\/www.mcneese.edu\/thereview\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/37\/2024\/01\/boudin-logo-1.jpg 438w, https:\/\/www.mcneese.edu\/thereview\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/37\/2024\/01\/boudin-logo-1-300x145.jpg 300w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 438px) 100vw, 438px\" \/><\/figure>\n<\/div>\n\n\n<p class=\"has-text-align-center has-large-font-size\">\ud83e\udca0 <a href=\"https:\/\/www.mcneese.edu\/thereview\/2024\/09\/23\/the-company-man\/\">Back<\/a> <a href=\"https:\/\/www.mcneese.edu\/thereview\/2024\/09\/23\/as-per-usual\/\">Next<\/a> \ud83e\udca1<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-medium-font-size\">To learn more about submitting your work to <em><a href=\"https:\/\/www.mcneese.edu\/thereview\/boudin-submissions\/\">Boudin<\/a><\/em> or applying to McNeese State University&#8217;s Creative Writing <a href=\"https:\/\/www.mcneese.edu\/thereview\/mfa-application-submissions\/\">MFA program<\/a>, please visit Submissions for details.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>DelSanto&#8217;s Beach Joe Kapitan __________ Remy, the foreman in Weighing\/Sorting, says I should never have been hired in the first place (Human Resources needs to start giving attitude tests, not aptitude tests, he says). Feldman has taken to sitting at another lunch table, the same Feldman who used to ask me daily if I was&hellip;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":42,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[218],"tags":[75,146],"class_list":["post-17467","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-workplace-wounds-and-woes","tag-boudin","tag-fiction-2"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.mcneese.edu\/thereview\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/17467","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.mcneese.edu\/thereview\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.mcneese.edu\/thereview\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.mcneese.edu\/thereview\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/42"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.mcneese.edu\/thereview\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=17467"}],"version-history":[{"count":5,"href":"https:\/\/www.mcneese.edu\/thereview\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/17467\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":17591,"href":"https:\/\/www.mcneese.edu\/thereview\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/17467\/revisions\/17591"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.mcneese.edu\/thereview\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=17467"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.mcneese.edu\/thereview\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=17467"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.mcneese.edu\/thereview\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=17467"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}