{"id":16013,"date":"2024-03-09T15:40:35","date_gmt":"2024-03-09T21:40:35","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.mcneese.edu\/thereview\/?p=16013"},"modified":"2024-03-20T11:33:14","modified_gmt":"2024-03-20T16:33:14","slug":"eminem-must-imagine-im-his-biggest-fan","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.mcneese.edu\/thereview\/2024\/03\/09\/eminem-must-imagine-im-his-biggest-fan\/","title":{"rendered":"Eminem Must Imagine I&#8217;m His Biggest Fan"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<ul class=\"wp-block-social-links is-content-justification-right is-layout-flex wp-container-core-social-links-is-layout-765c4724 wp-block-social-links-is-layout-flex\"><li class=\"wp-social-link wp-social-link-facebook  wp-block-social-link\"><a href=\"https:\/\/www.facebook.com\/profile.php?id=61556140010887\" class=\"wp-block-social-link-anchor\"><svg width=\"24\" height=\"24\" viewBox=\"0 0 24 24\" version=\"1.1\" xmlns=\"http:\/\/www.w3.org\/2000\/svg\" aria-hidden=\"true\" focusable=\"false\"><path d=\"M12 2C6.5 2 2 6.5 2 12c0 5 3.7 9.1 8.4 9.9v-7H7.9V12h2.5V9.8c0-2.5 1.5-3.9 3.8-3.9 1.1 0 2.2.2 2.2.2v2.5h-1.3c-1.2 0-1.6.8-1.6 1.6V12h2.8l-.4 2.9h-2.3v7C18.3 21.1 22 17 22 12c0-5.5-4.5-10-10-10z\"><\/path><\/svg><span class=\"wp-block-social-link-label screen-reader-text\">Facebook<\/span><\/a><\/li>\n\n<li class=\"wp-social-link wp-social-link-instagram  wp-block-social-link\"><a href=\"https:\/\/www.instagram.com\/boudin_mcneese\/\" class=\"wp-block-social-link-anchor\"><svg width=\"24\" height=\"24\" viewBox=\"0 0 24 24\" version=\"1.1\" xmlns=\"http:\/\/www.w3.org\/2000\/svg\" aria-hidden=\"true\" focusable=\"false\"><path d=\"M12,4.622c2.403,0,2.688,0.009,3.637,0.052c0.877,0.04,1.354,0.187,1.671,0.31c0.42,0.163,0.72,0.358,1.035,0.673 c0.315,0.315,0.51,0.615,0.673,1.035c0.123,0.317,0.27,0.794,0.31,1.671c0.043,0.949,0.052,1.234,0.052,3.637 s-0.009,2.688-0.052,3.637c-0.04,0.877-0.187,1.354-0.31,1.671c-0.163,0.42-0.358,0.72-0.673,1.035 c-0.315,0.315-0.615,0.51-1.035,0.673c-0.317,0.123-0.794,0.27-1.671,0.31c-0.949,0.043-1.233,0.052-3.637,0.052 s-2.688-0.009-3.637-0.052c-0.877-0.04-1.354-0.187-1.671-0.31c-0.42-0.163-0.72-0.358-1.035-0.673 c-0.315-0.315-0.51-0.615-0.673-1.035c-0.123-0.317-0.27-0.794-0.31-1.671C4.631,14.688,4.622,14.403,4.622,12 s0.009-2.688,0.052-3.637c0.04-0.877,0.187-1.354,0.31-1.671c0.163-0.42,0.358-0.72,0.673-1.035 c0.315-0.315,0.615-0.51,1.035-0.673c0.317-0.123,0.794-0.27,1.671-0.31C9.312,4.631,9.597,4.622,12,4.622 M12,3 C9.556,3,9.249,3.01,8.289,3.054C7.331,3.098,6.677,3.25,6.105,3.472C5.513,3.702,5.011,4.01,4.511,4.511 c-0.5,0.5-0.808,1.002-1.038,1.594C3.25,6.677,3.098,7.331,3.054,8.289C3.01,9.249,3,9.556,3,12c0,2.444,0.01,2.751,0.054,3.711 c0.044,0.958,0.196,1.612,0.418,2.185c0.23,0.592,0.538,1.094,1.038,1.594c0.5,0.5,1.002,0.808,1.594,1.038 c0.572,0.222,1.227,0.375,2.185,0.418C9.249,20.99,9.556,21,12,21s2.751-0.01,3.711-0.054c0.958-0.044,1.612-0.196,2.185-0.418 c0.592-0.23,1.094-0.538,1.594-1.038c0.5-0.5,0.808-1.002,1.038-1.594c0.222-0.572,0.375-1.227,0.418-2.185 C20.99,14.751,21,14.444,21,12s-0.01-2.751-0.054-3.711c-0.044-0.958-0.196-1.612-0.418-2.185c-0.23-0.592-0.538-1.094-1.038-1.594 c-0.5-0.5-1.002-0.808-1.594-1.038c-0.572-0.222-1.227-0.375-2.185-0.418C14.751,3.01,14.444,3,12,3L12,3z M12,7.378 c-2.552,0-4.622,2.069-4.622,4.622S9.448,16.622,12,16.622s4.622-2.069,4.622-4.622S14.552,7.378,12,7.378z M12,15 c-1.657,0-3-1.343-3-3s1.343-3,3-3s3,1.343,3,3S13.657,15,12,15z M16.804,6.116c-0.596,0-1.08,0.484-1.08,1.08 s0.484,1.08,1.08,1.08c0.596,0,1.08-0.484,1.08-1.08S17.401,6.116,16.804,6.116z\"><\/path><\/svg><span class=\"wp-block-social-link-label screen-reader-text\">Instagram<\/span><\/a><\/li><\/ul>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-large-font-size\"><strong>Eminem Must Imagine I&#8217;m His Biggest Fan<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-medium-font-size\"><strong>Alex M. Frankel<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-medium-font-size\">__________<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-medium-font-size\"><em>Hey Alex, Eminem made you something special!<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-medium-font-size\"><em>\u201cAt the crib playing Fortnite with your grandma\u201d<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-medium-font-size\"><em>Numbered gold vinyl exclusively for Spotify stans.<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-medium-font-size\"><em>Limited quantity available, act fast while supplies last!<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n<div style=\"height:34px\" aria-hidden=\"true\" class=\"wp-block-spacer\"><\/div>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-medium-font-size\">So I\u2019m not just a fan, I\u2019m a stan<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-medium-font-size\">Just because I use hip hop and three pink noise devices<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-medium-font-size\">To drown out the tumult of roofers<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-medium-font-size\">Busy trampling and hammering<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-medium-font-size\">Over my head all day while I sleep.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-medium-font-size\">It\u2019s genius, the beat of rap and ear-splitting waterfall fury,<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-medium-font-size\">I sleep like a child of fifteen<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-medium-font-size\">But I\u2019ve barely heard the artist\u2019s words.&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-medium-font-size\">I note he has 72 million listeners on Spotify alone<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-medium-font-size\">While Stravinsky has barely half a million<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-medium-font-size\">And Simon Sechter has a measly 84,<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-medium-font-size\">Which surpasses me who have zero.&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-medium-font-size\">I once saw a clip of an Eminem show<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-medium-font-size\">And fixated on one girl\u2019s transported face, the devotion,<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-medium-font-size\">Connectedness and joy pouring into and out of her.&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-medium-font-size\">I know poets who\u2019d give their right arms for such love<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-medium-font-size\">But I wonder at his happiness quotient,<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-medium-font-size\">How does it feel to have 72 million stans,<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-medium-font-size\">Does he exist so thrilled he can\u2019t eat or sleep?<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-medium-font-size\">With 72 million I would levitate to the empyrean,<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-medium-font-size\">I\u2019d have godlike whims and godlike notions,<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-medium-font-size\">What need would I have of the real Lord God?&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-medium-font-size\">The last time I ever gave a reading<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-medium-font-size\">Only four homeless showed up because I brought snacks.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-medium-font-size\">Tummies full, they had a lovely snooze as I recited.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-medium-font-size\">My voice was to them what Eminem\u2019s beat is to me,<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-medium-font-size\">Allowing me to defy the roofers,<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-medium-font-size\">Sleep through the most extreme foot-stomping racket<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-medium-font-size\">And kicking and yelling in Guatemalan Spanish.&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-medium-font-size\">Instead of feeling envy, I should offer thanks to Eminem<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-medium-font-size\">For helping me to find sleep in a hellish predicament.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-medium-font-size\">Thank you, Eminem! When I wake at 6 p.m.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-medium-font-size\">The roofers are gone, it\u2019s dark, I dawdle by the fire<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-medium-font-size\">And enjoy my Christmas tree though it\u2019s February 1.&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-medium-font-size\">These days Spotify recommends Jay-Z, 50 Cent, Notorious B.I.G.,<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-medium-font-size\">Stravinsky and Sechter have long been pushed out.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-medium-font-size\"><em>What\u2019s it mean to be a Stan of sixty-three<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-medium-font-size\"><em>While I wilt by the fire and stare at my tree?<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-medium-font-size\"><em>I\u2019ve got one fan and that is my hamsta<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-medium-font-size\"><em>What\u2019ll she do when I turn full gansta\u2026<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n<div style=\"height:30px\" aria-hidden=\"true\" class=\"wp-block-spacer\"><\/div>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-medium-font-size\">The hearth fire crackles me to sleep, I shave my head<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-medium-font-size\">And then shave Eminem\u2019s cold head, he kisses my goatee.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-medium-font-size\">Nothing wrong with lying on this rooftop.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-medium-font-size\">We are both deaf mutes, consume 72 servings of 50 Cent.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-medium-font-size\">Monstrous eighteen-wheelers and wilting peasants float by,<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-medium-font-size\">Fortnite has gone to our guts.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>___________<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><strong>Playlist song:<\/strong> <a href=\"https:\/\/open.spotify.com\/playlist\/2DGL2kl6olesM3rnA0rZ6N?si=db16a2b031e44d4e&amp;nd=1&amp;dlsi=b8920d324dbf4a26\">Eminem, &#8220;Tone Deaf&#8221;<\/a><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-medium-font-size\">__________<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-medium-font-size\"><strong>Alex M. Frankel<\/strong> left Spain in the 1990s to settle in Southern California, occasionally publishing under the name Alejo Rovira Goldner. He has written poetry, non-fiction and plays, and his latest chapbook is called <em>So Many Mouths at the End of All Beauty.<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><strong>__________<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n<div class=\"wp-block-image\">\n<figure class=\"alignleft size-full\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" width=\"438\" height=\"211\" src=\"https:\/\/www.mcneese.edu\/thereview\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/37\/2024\/01\/boudin-logo-1.jpg\" alt=\"\" class=\"wp-image-15484\" srcset=\"https:\/\/www.mcneese.edu\/thereview\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/37\/2024\/01\/boudin-logo-1.jpg 438w, https:\/\/www.mcneese.edu\/thereview\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/37\/2024\/01\/boudin-logo-1-300x145.jpg 300w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 438px) 100vw, 438px\" \/><\/figure>\n<\/div>\n\n\n<p class=\"has-text-align-center has-large-font-size\"> \ud83e\udca0 <a href=\"https:\/\/www.mcneese.edu\/thereview\/2024\/03\/09\/enter-the-bassoon\/\">Back<\/a> <a href=\"https:\/\/www.mcneese.edu\/thereview\/2024\/03\/09\/the-show\/\">Next<\/a> \ud83e\udca1<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-medium-font-size\">To learn more about submitting your work to <em><a href=\"https:\/\/www.mcneese.edu\/thereview\/boudin-submissions\/\">Boudin<\/a><\/em> or applying to McNeese State University&#8217;s Creative Writing <a href=\"https:\/\/www.mcneese.edu\/thereview\/mfa-application-submissions\/\">MFA program<\/a>, please visit Submissions for details.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Eminem Must Imagine I&#8217;m His Biggest Fan Alex M. Frankel __________ Hey Alex, Eminem made you something special! \u201cAt the crib playing Fortnite with your grandma\u201d Numbered gold vinyl exclusively for Spotify stans. Limited quantity available, act fast while supplies last! So I\u2019m not just a fan, I\u2019m a stan Just because I use hip&hellip;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":42,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[199],"tags":[75,198,145],"class_list":["post-16013","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-all-music-espressivo-24","tag-boudin","tag-music","tag-poetry-2"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.mcneese.edu\/thereview\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/16013","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.mcneese.edu\/thereview\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.mcneese.edu\/thereview\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.mcneese.edu\/thereview\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/42"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.mcneese.edu\/thereview\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=16013"}],"version-history":[{"count":5,"href":"https:\/\/www.mcneese.edu\/thereview\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/16013\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":16433,"href":"https:\/\/www.mcneese.edu\/thereview\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/16013\/revisions\/16433"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.mcneese.edu\/thereview\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=16013"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.mcneese.edu\/thereview\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=16013"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.mcneese.edu\/thereview\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=16013"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}